I've done it! And only four days late! Letterbox contact letter is winging its way digitally to the appropriate local government employee even as I write.
I blogged a while ago about the issues I have with maintaining birth family contact. It's not that I am against contact per se, but I strongly believe that this contact shouldn't be initiated or carried on without the active consent of the adopted child. It feels completely wrong to me that I am writing to OB's birth family about him while he is, as yet, too young to have any say in what is written, or even whether a letter is written at all.
Of course when he is older, he will be able to say whether he wants these letters to be written or not, and to have some input into what is written, but he won't be able to unsend or unsay what has already been done. This is one of many areas where I feel that the birth family and not the child are given more consideration in decision-making.
I have close relatives that I no longer see and I would be very unhappy if I found that people I trusted had been writing to them regularly, updating them on details of my life. My preference would be that contact is not initiated until the child is able to ask for it. In our case, I would imagine that by the time next year's letterbox comes around, OB will be in more of a position to participate to some extent. At the moment, as a 2-year-old who hasn't seen anyone from his birth family for well over a year, the whole thing completely passes him by and I feel like I'm talking about him behind his back.
But, I have signed a contract (there didn't seem to be any choice in that) so I've written the letter. I've not been looking forward to it, and in fact I've put it off over and over again during the last month but actually, when I got down to it, it wasn't so bad. I think I put my teacher's head on somewhat as it does read rather like a slightly chatty school report.
In some ways it's been rather nice to think back over the past year and remember all the things we've done together and all the progress that he's made. A year is a long time in the life of a toddler, so there's been plenty to write about.
And now we wait to see if there's a response . . . .